“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.”

Rebecca – age 8

Lasting, real, deep love includes giving without expecting anything in return. It includes seeing and accepting the other person, whether it’s our child, our parent or life partner, as a blend of complicated, intertwined parts. It includes painting her nails because she has always liked having pretty toes. It includes understanding that even if they’re not perfect, he is doing it as an act of love.

I was recently interviewed by Cynthia Iorio for her podcast, “Love. Transform. Evolve.” One thing I talked about was that my sister and I maintain a geranium on our mother’s veranda. It seems like a small thing, but it isn’t. The joy our mother gets from seeing it out her window as she sits in her recliner is obvious. She often comments on the flower’s beauty and reminds us to water it. The geranium is a tangible, lovely link to all that she was able to do before, especially her passion for gardening and flowers. Hopefully, she knows it is a way that we show our love for her. – Maria